QSFer Or M. Bialik has a new queer sci-fi spy romance out (bi, lesbian, non-binary, poly, trans MTF): My Mom Said So.
Ismat’s dating life is terrible, and a lot of it has to do with honesty. Not that he doesn’t want to be honest, he just can’t – or it will ruin his life. He can’t tell anyone he works for the Dominion Security Bureau counter-terrorism division; he can’t tell his date who his father is, even if he knows them, and he most definitely can’t tell them how he actually feels about the gender he has to wear.
A possible security breach in the Bureau means that he and his immediate boss are the only people who can be trusted with a case. Things rapidly become more complicated as the Bureau’s Director pulls two foreign agents into the mix. More complicated than others because Ismat finds one of them very attractive, something which he would rather the agent not know. Unfortunately – she’s telepathic.
When the investigation leads them to a women-only charity event, Ismat finds some use for the dresses kept in the back of the closet and finds out that having a partner who knows what you think is not such a bad thing.
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Excerpt
I woke up with Asu Medeni wrapped around me. Mom insisted we take the bedroom, and she slept on the foldout couch in the living room. It was still early, and I needed to use the restroom, but I did not feel like moving from under Asu Medeni. The evening before was nice. After about two rounds they kicked me out of the game. Between not having decent psychic defenses and Mom just knowing me, they could both read me too easily. But we chatted and spent time together and had a pleasant evening, a familial one. I enjoyed it, it has been years since I had had just a calm domestic evening with people.
Holding it in when you are female is much harder than as male, so I wiggled out before I soiled the bed and headed to the restroom. Mom was already up and had a cup of Brown waiting for me when I came out. I wanted to go back to bed, but the smell of the Brown and the opportunity to have a talk with Mom before Asu Medeni woke up tipped the scale.
Done in the bathroom, I sat next to the counter, nursing my mug, while Mom was trying to figure out breakfast. “Mom,” I said. “Can I ask you something?”
Mom stopped rummaging through the cupboard and looked at me, a bit concerned. “Sure.”
“Back when we were on the road in the Alliance, you wouldn’t let me out of your sight in case I met someone and ran off on you,” I started.
“Didn’t help me once we got back, and you ran off to the Service,” she said. It was a year after we got back, but at the time, it was the only way I could think of to get out of the house. We did not really talk for a few years after that. Which, in retrospect, puts her vanishing to the Alliance for two years without telling me makes more sense.
“But once I was back,” I continued, “and settled on male form.” She was actually remarkably supportive of me transitioning, in either direction. “You could not get me into the dating scene sooner.”
“You were old enough,” she said. “And all my friends were starting to have grandkids by that point.” Which was a lie. None of Mom’s friends in the Dominion had kids, let alone grandkids, as far as I know. I am fairly sure they did not; she would have not shut up about it if they did.
“But every girl I told you I was dating you had issues with.” I took a breath. “Then I come home with a stranger I barely know for a week, and you can’t have her knock me up fast enough.” I looked at her. “I don’t get it.”
Mom grabbed one of my hands. “Ismi, sweetie, let me ask you something,” she said. “Was there a single girl you dated you did not lie to?” I was taken aback a bit by that. “I know you can’t talk about your work,” she said. “You keep telling me it is with the government, but not which agency. So I’m guessing it’s something like the Security Bureau.” I was trying to respond to that, but Mom knew me well enough to get her confirmation. “If you can’t tell me, you can’t tell a girl you just met, right?” I nodded. “Then there is your parentage, which I’m sure you did not breach on the first date.” Or any date for that matter. “You did not go to a match-making service, since they would want genetic data. So you are left with the girls that know they won’t find anyone through a service because something is wrong with them, or the hopelessly romantic that are looking for that true love.” There was something hard in her eyes. “Does any of that sound like the base of a healthy long-term relationship to you?”
I gazed deep into my mug. “Not really,” I said.
She picked up my chin and had me look at her. “Then you come in here with a girl that you clearly like, who clearly likes you, who is apparently in the same shady field of work as you, and that you can’t lie to.” My eyes grew a bit bigger. “I know how to spot a telepath,” Mom said. It’s actually a bit scary how sharp she can be sometimes. “And on top of that, she got you to be more yourself than you’ve been in years.” Mom gave my hand a kiss and let go. “So, of course, I’m going to do everything I can to get you two together.” Mom placed her hand on my knee. “She’s good for you.”
“But not the right place,” I said. “Or the right time.”
“Ismat,” Mom said. “Be a big girl, an opportunity like this comes along, you make it work.”
I smiled warily. “It’s not that simple, Mom,” I said.
Mom walked back to the cupboard. “It’s relationships, sweetie,” she said. “They’re never simple.”
Author Bio
Or M. Bialik has spent the last decade and change crisscrossing the planet, trying to understand the effects and impacts of modern and ancient climate change. A PhD in Earth and Environmental Sciences, they have seen a thing or two that exceeds the scope of understanding by just looking at it.
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